August 16, 2024
Home from the hospital again. This operation was a doozy. Getting mobile again is a bit more challenging but my nurses at the hospital said they were amazed at my progress and strength.
They had to check my tissue every hour to make sure it wasnโt rejected. I had to ask for help to detach from machines every time I needed to pee. I was on pain killers, nerve medicine and anti nausea meds and my stomach was a mess. Doctors came and went, teams were in and out checking my tissue. I wasnโt able to sleep much. Physical therapists came to work with me every day and they mostly got in my way. The pain and tightness I had in my arms from the masectomy is almost completely gone. Now the incision from hip to hip and the stomach pain are slowing me down. I am committed to resting when necessary but have already done more than I should every day since being home.
When I left the hospital my nurses all came to say goodbye. They were so kind to me and told they knew I would be okay. They said I was so strong, brave and positive I had been a ray of sunshine while I was there. My night nurse Tori told me I reminded her why she became a nurse. She said she would never forget me and I had to take care of myself because I was worth it. I reminded her to do the same and we both cried and told each other we loved each other. It was very emotional and wonderful. I felt so special.
Yesterday, I sent the nurses donuts on that floor as a thank you and the nurse who answered took my message for them all. I told her I wanted to thank them all for saving lives everyday. I wanted to thank them for all their hard work and love they bring to work every day. She said they never get gifts like that and it would be so appreciated and I said well you all deserve more and hung up before I got too teary.
Every day I am feeling a bit better but itโs much slower than last time. So much of it is learning what works for my unique anatomy and finding ways to accommodate myself. My pink sister Merri has given me the best recommendations. She has been my DIEP mentor and I am so thankful my pink sister Angel lead me to her. I want to share that with others in my place. I thought I would check into a mentorship program for reconstruction to see if anything in our area exists like that. In the meantime, I need to update my youtube now that Iโm able to have the energy to do an update.
The kids have been trying to be good but I am very concerned that Charles is going back to work Thursday. Almost everything I eat is a gift from a kind hearted friend. My friends Jessica, Erin and April brought me food to eat this week and a friend Iโve never met is bringing me food tonight. My friend Erin in going to come over for a bit and help entertain the kids on Thursday. On Friday my friend Meg is helping too and tonight my friend Dawn is coming to teach me to knit. My heart is full and my body is healing and filled with love. The support I have is something I hope to give back someday. Until then I am reminding myself, I would do the same for them so I can accept it. I remain humbled and I feel so loved. I almost canโt believe how surrounded by love I am. I feel wonderful even though I am in pain.